NZ Single Parents Trust

This may be something you are interested in.

We are looking for people to film with for a television documentary about solo parenting in New Zealand.

We can pay $1500 for the week to mitigate the time spent liaising during preproduction and for the week of a (small) TV crew following you around and we are looking for someone who might be:

– A solo mother with one or more children, one of whom is below the age of three.

– Prepared to show us their daily life over the course of one typical week.

– Raising kids in a positive environment but able to explain about and show the challenges of solo parenting

The documentary will be shot and edited by professional crew using the best professional equipment and will be a fantastic high quality memento of your young family at the time of filming.

Filming can take place anywhere in New Zealand and will be sometime in mid April this year.

If you are embarrassed about being on TV don’t worry as the program will not be aired in New Zealand. It is a Japanese TV series being shot around the world but aired only in Japan.

If you are interesting in being involved please contact us. We will need to ask some questions to build up a profile about you and your family then discus with the director whether your story is the one she is looking for. (The series is being filmed all over the world and we need to avoid double ups and similarities with episodes shot in other countries so please don’t be disappointed if you are not selected as this does not reflect on you but on the balance of stories being filmed for the whole series)

If you wish to know more about the series please don’t hesitate to contact us. Your call will be treated with the strictest confidence and we hope to hear from you soon.

New Zealand Network Ltd.
Phone (09) 424 6388
Email: info@nznetwork.com

Kiwi women are commencing menstruation earlier and developing larger breasts. Kiwi men sperm-counts have halved. We have to ask ourselves why?! Of course, nutrition is a huge part of the complex situation. So almost every day society in general is becoming just a little bit more aware of the positive ramifications of eating organic food – meaning the type of food human beings had always eaten until 50-60 years ago, now fashionably called bio-dynamic food.

It is good, we are now questioning how harmful it is to expose ourselves at a metabolic cellular level, to constant amounts of dioxin carcinogenic (cancer-causing) or teratogenic (fetal malformation-causing) pesticides, such as chemical insecticides, herbicides and fungicides; plus all the synthetic fertilizers; artificial colourings; flavour enhancers; chemical preservatives; antibiotic growth promotant feed enhancers; and other synthetic additives.

But what of our toxic homes ??

Partnering with bio-dynamic food ideals are the principles of bio-harmonic living – that is living in a healthy home that uses natural bio-building principles, such as an energy-efficient design, low-toxicity materials, and environmental sustainability of renewable natural resources. This is another area where Kiwis are becoming adept — housing solutions using clay, sand, straw, earth and recycled reused materials.
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Family First Media Release 14 February 2010

Family First NZ has posted a reward of $25,000 for information or evidence which leads to a conviction of any person responsible for the murder of the Kahui twins.

“The Kahui twins were murdered almost 4 years ago yet nobody has been accountable for their deaths and no further action is being taken by the police or the Coroner at this stage,” says Bob McCoskrie, National Director of Family First NZ.

“The police acknowledge that the closing of ranks by the families and the ‘right to silence’ and refusal to be interviewed had made the investigation incredibly difficult, with the Kahui family being referred to as the ‘tight 12’. Yet we now have two victims of child abuse screaming for justice – where are their rights?”

“This should not be allowed to be swept under the carpet. NZ’ers want answers to this case – who killed the twins, why did the prosecution fail, and what were the contributing factors to these murders that need to be tackled to avoid similar cases in the future.”

Family First NZ, with the support of the Sensible Sentencing Trust and For the Sake of Our Children Trust, is hoping that the offer of a reward will be the incentive needed for the information to come out which leads to a successful conviction.

“Somebody within the family knows what happened and who was responsible. It’s time they cleared their conscience, came forward with the truth, and got a decent night’s sleep for the first time in 4 years,” says Mr McCoskrie

“The country was shocked and revolted by this case and the accompanying issues of substance abuse, family breakdown, welfare dependency, neglect, and legal issues affecting the police’s ability to solve the case. Yet the message to child abusers has been that their rights will be given more weight than the rights of children to protection and justice.”

“A reward of $25,000 will be a small price to pay for justice to be served for Chris and Cru who would and should have turned four years old next month,” says Mr McCoskrie

Family First NZ is reminding and possibly informing parents that when they complete their IRD Tax Returns for the financial year ended 31 March 2010, they are entitled to claim back 1/3’rd of their school fees.

“Amidst the debate on whether school fees are compulsory or not, many parents aren’t aware that school donations qualify for the Donations Rebate,” says National Director Bob McCoskrie. “This rebate which now has no cap means that parents can get a refund of a third of the school donation. This may be welcome news to families struggling with beginning-of-year expenses.”

The IRD rules state that the following payments qualify for the Donation Rebate:

• Donation payments to state schools (including integrated schools), schools approved as charities for tax purposes, school boards of trustees or parent-teacher associations. These payments must be donations, not just a payment of school fees.
• state-funded schools for payment of fees, as long as these go to the school’s general fund.

Payments that don’t qualify are:

• payments for classes where there is a take-home component, such as woodwork
• where attendance or participation of the activity is voluntary
• transport to or from a school activity, such as a camp or food at the camp
• tertiary or tuition fees.

Mr McCoskrie says that although schools and parents can be confused over the terminology of ‘fees’ and ‘donations’, parents should claim for any general purpose school payments they have made, irrespective of how the school labels them.

He says the IRD should put out guidelines into each school so that parents are aware of this Rebate, and are clear as to which payments qualify and which don’t.

Parents will need a Rebate Claim Form (IR 526) which will either be sent to them or can be obtained from: www.ird.govt.nz or by phoning 0800 257 773.

EFF’s Top 12 Ways to Protect Your Online Privacy

1) Do not reveal personal information inadvertently.

You may be “shedding” personal details, including e-mail addresses and other contact information, without even knowing it unless you properly configure your Web browser. In your browser’s “Setup”, “Options” or “Preferences” menus, you may wish to use a pseudonym instead of your real name, and not enter an e-mail address, nor provide other personally identifiable information that you don’t wish to share. When visiting a site you trust you can choose to give them your info, in forms on their site; there is no need for your browser to potentially make this information available to all comers. Also be on the lookout for system-wide “Internet defaults” programs on your computer (some examples include Window’s Internet Control Panel, and MacOS’s Configuration Manager, and the third-party Mac utility named Internet Config). While they are useful for various things, like keeping multiple Web browers and other Internet tools consistent in how to treat downloaded files and such, they should probably also be anonymized just like your browser itself, if they contain any fields for personal information. Households with children may have an additional “security problem” – have you set clear rules for your kids, so that they know not to reveal personal information unless you OK it on a site-by-site basis?

2) Turn on cookie notices in your Web browser, and/or use cookie management software or infomediaries.
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Question: Can I Find Hope When I Feel Like a “Lonely Single Parent?”

I hate to sound like a “lonely single parent,” but it’s such a challenge to meet new people when I barely have time for myself as it is. What can I do? Should I resign myself to feeling lonely until my kids are older?

Answer: It’s not uncommon to feel lonely as a single parent. After all, so much of your time and energy are emptied out in caring for your children and providing for your kids’ needs, that it’s easy for your responsibilities to overshadow a potential social life. However, with some effort, you can overcome feeling like a “lonely single parent” and create the kind of social life you long for. Begin by asking yourself the following questions and choosing one or two of the suggested activities below:

1.  What would I really like my social life to look like?

Spend some time envisioning what it would be like to have a fulfilling, active social life. Who would you be spending your time with? How would your children fit into this scenario? Sometimes just getting clear about your ultimate goals can help you find ways to make those dreams a reality.

2. What is standing in my way?

What’s the biggest obstacle right now to your having a lively, engaging social life? Is it time? Is it a lack of opportunity? Could it also be connected to your feelings about yourself? Getting clear about the obstacles you face, or even the walls you may inadvertently put up, can help you overcome them.

3. Does the effort I’m making to meet new people match my desire for an active, enjoyable social life?

If it doesn’t, step up the effort you’re making. In this way, you can work to overcome feeling like a “lonely single parent” by changing the effort you’re making. Try:

To read more click on read more underneath this sentence.

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I recently received an e-mail from a single parent asking if I know of any Christian Single Parent’s groups. I think this is a good question and I’d like to have a list of churches who have support groups.

There was one I found in Christchurch 3 years ago and I had heard from a group of Christian women who had a wonderful opening day in Auckland yet I can’t remember their website. Another church had contacted us over a year ago through Waitakere City council also.

I will have to use my brain to try and find them but if by chance anyone out there knows of a Christian group or two, please share and leave a comment.

IN the meantime, here’s a helpful  article I found on Kiwifamilies

Somebody Help Me!

One winter night a few years ago, I found myself lying on the bathroom floor, pausing between bouts of vomiting and diarrheoa to listen out for my toddler who had whooping cough. You could say it was not one of my better moments.

But in the midst of it all, I suddenly found myself worrying about the lawn. It was alarmingly long, I had no lawn mower and couldn’t afford to buy one. Even if I could, my daughter was terrified of the noise so what would I do with her while I did the job?

The practical needs of a solo parent can be overwhelming. On top of the jobs common to all mothers, single mums, for example, have total responsibility for home, garden and car maintenance. Most, even on the benefit, have to work at least part-time; and making all the decisions all of the time is a heavy burden.
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I had big plans for single parents over the Christmas holidays that didn’t eventuate. Tickets  sit on my table for wonderful events that have passed, new members joined the site only to be ignored while e-mails and comments received no reply.  Other events needing to be added were never mentioned online either.

I feel just awful to have let so many down and disheartened that opportunities to get to know others were missed. I guess all I can do is apologise and make up for it in this new year of 2010.    Oh, I guess there is one more thing I can do.  Explain what happened and ask for readers and members to be understanding………….Hmm, Ok, here goes …….

At the beginning of December  I was rushed to North Shore Hospital via ambulance in excruciating pain. It was a terrible trip feeling every bump in the road but the ambulance stopped to try and provide some pain relief while they are not allowed to carry strong pain killers.

I vaguely remember the beginning part of my time in  A&E (accident and emergency) and part of the end of the  day. I must have had an x-ray or ultrasound because I remember being in a room and put asleep for a minor type of surgery. I remember being in a patients bed on the surgery ward afterwards, being hooked up to a morphine drip, moving from a room of 4 patients to my own single room, another minor type of surgery and my sons visiting. Oh, I remember the nurse I had.  She was great!

I remember the following morning when I was taken from the surgery ward to intensive care.  I remember a male nurse leaning over me to hook up an oxygen mask saying ‘welcome princess’, and a team of doctors with one saying, “You have a team of 20 and we will work things out together” as well as “You need to breathe through this oxygen mask till 2pm”.
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Hi all, …. it’s that time again already. Wow! Where does the time go?

This year we have a few events for November/December.  Please let us know what you are interested in.

Click here to view “Events at the Parenting Place”

Two events you won’t want to miss. Get in quick and purchase your tickets now.
Christmas Event Fundraiser – an evening hosted by Amanda Pilbrow, Thurs 12 Nov 7.00pm-10.00pm

Two dynamic speakers on two helpful topics

1. How to survive the Christmas season without killing your family
- Allison Mooney

Allison Mooney is one of New Zealand’s most sort after professional speakers.

2. Decorating ideas – Anya Brighouse

Anya Brighouse is interior designer and stylist for Parenting Magazine.

BOOK NOW – tickets only $25

Ticket price includes drinks and light supper. ($10 from every ticket sale will go to The Salvation Army Bethany Centre.)

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Question:

Théun, I am battling with the hurt I am experiencing as a result of my divorce. This hurt mostly comes from us starting to argue about how we should be splitting up our joint assets, and it is this that hurts me, mostly because I keep on wondering if our marriage meant nothing more than the acquisition of material things. How does one resolve hurt, Théun?

Théun’s Guidance:
My lovely Easterly friend, you are talking and thinking yourself round in circles! You are trying to RESOLVE the hurt instead of STAYING WITH the hurt, allowing it to guide you to a deeper understanding of yourself whereupon it will automatically DISSIPATE, having served its purpose! This is the TRUE meaning of the term “resolve,” that is, the intent to learn! But when it comes to intent, to resolving, the mind is a little less than useless!

The only REAL hurt there is, is when we are brought face to face with our INABILITY to MEET another unit of life with whom we have come very close in being able to truly meet! It is not the money, the houses, the furniture, the kitchens, the children, the dogs and parrots, but that indefinable some-thing else, loosely termed, love! In other words, whilst the mind occupies itself with material things such as houses, earnings, etc., it is the HEART that feels the wrench in the parting of ways, and the subsequent pain of loss – the deep sadness that comes from knowing that we were given a chance, but that somehow we screwed up! Sure it takes two to tango, and therefore it also takes two to screw up, but where there is a genuine openness of heart, or even just the BEGINNINGS of an opening of the heart, the sense of loss is always devastating in that one can always see one’s own role so clearly!
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