WHEN Erin Pizzey was a small girl she pleaded for help from a teacher, blood running down her legs from a whipping her mother had given her. Her plea was dismissed. No one would believe such violence was possible in this rich, glamorous diplomat’s family. That was 60 years ago.
In 1971, Pizzey launched one of Britain’s first women’s refuges but became disenchanted when the refuge movement was hijacked by women promoting anti-male agendas. Since then, she has been fighting a mighty battle to expose the truth about family violence: namely that girls and boys, who are exposed to violence in early childhood, can grow up to repeat what they have learnt.
She has written about her own experiences; her 193cm father was a bully but it was her beautiful, 144cm mother who terrorised and battered her family. She’s written books and articles exposing the anti-male myths being propagated about domestic violence, documenting research that shows domestic violence is often reciprocal, with men and women locked into destructive behaviour.
As she explained in her radio interview with Dads on the Air it made her unpopular with British feminists who had turned domestic violence into a million dollar industry. She received death threats and was heckled while speaking publicly in the UK and US. Yet, she continues to speak out about the failure to recognise that women can be equally complicit in such violence.
It’s not in our interests she says, for women to be continually taught they are victims. Pizzey takes a swipe at Australia’s Violence Against Women campaigns, which show a never-ending parade of violent men. There is never a hint that men are sometimes victims. “It’s a terrible lie,” says Pizzey, who has written extensively about women who behave as “emotional terrorists”.
The whims and actions of such women determine the emotional climate of the household. Pizzey makes the telling point that marital dissolution can “call to the fore the terrorist’s estructiveness”, mentioning the women who make false allegations of violence or sexual abuse, or simply cut dad out of the lives of children.
An important step towards a more balanced debate was made with the publication of Allegations of Family Violence and Child Abuse in Family Law Children’s Proceedings. The report was produced by the Australian Institute of Family Studies. It examined 399 cases and found most involved allegations of violence, often from both sides. In these circumstances, where unsubstantiated allegations fly in both directions, it’s just too hard for judges to see the wood for the trees, suggest the AIFS researchers. They found it was rare for judgments to deny contact on the basis of such allegations. The report is critical of Australian research on violence in Family Court matters. The report shows much of this research relies on small, carefully selected samples to draw misleading conclusions about male violence.
This blinkered research “rarely concedes the possibility that at least some of the violence may be situational, one-off, reciprocated, or even at times initiated by women,” says the AIFS report. How refreshing to see AIFS research acknowledge that there’s a very real difference between the situational violence common in marital separation, with both parties doing things they later regret, and the more systemic controlling violence where the males are almost always the perpetrator. In the latter case, court intervention is often necessary to protect children and mothers from these dangerous men. The challenge is a court system that can properly identify them.
But what’s needed with situational violence is for men and women to be helped to calm down and look carefully at the impact of their behaviour, particularly on their children. Child-centred mediation in the Family Relationships Centres is helping people learn to stop the violence, unlike court processes, which often serve to escalate it.
A worthwhile comment on this story.
According to Ms. Arndt’s article, the feminazis have coined a new term with which to batter men. Dividing domestic violence into two categories, “situational violence”, and “systemic violence”, she readily accepts the notion that the latter is far worse, and is the sole province of males. Blaming males and absolving females has always been the ideology of the domestic violence industry. However, this flies in the face of legitimate, academic/scientific studies conducted in the US, UK, NZ, Canada, and AU. In those studies, relying on the testimony of tens of thousands of respondents, it was found that 64% of domestic violence was INITIATED by the female. That fact only includes physical violence, the kind the industry would have us believe that only men perpetrate. Totally ignored for decades, is the amount of violence perpetrated by women AGAINST women. Violence and forced sexual activity in lesbian relationships occurs at almost DOUBLE the rate in heterosexual partnerships. The obvious question is why that female violence is ignored. The obvious answer is that the domestic violence industry is dominated by anti-male lesbians, and the profits are too great to risk by telling the truth on themselves. The individuals and agencies of the domestic violence industry are not anti-violence so much as pro-profit. Political as well as monetary.
news.com.au/heraldsun
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So if all this is true then all of society needs to start listening to the researchers who are using scientific research and not women’s studies research which uses hypotheses. This is the side in NZ that is scientific and they are objecting to women’s studies research. And this is the biggest study in the world.
Domestic violence campaigners accused of bias
Infact here is another feminist that has spoken up. This one from the most powerful feminist group in the world besides the United Nations.
Entries (RSS)
October 4th, 2007 at 11:31 am
Why don’t you knock it off Julie. I am a feminist. I have worked for a feminist organisation for the last ten years and they are the best employers I have ever had. Let me enlighten you - a feminist is anyone who disagrees with the misuse of power across all sections of society - sex, age, race and so forth. Speaking of power - I wonder what it is like for people who don’t necessarily agree with you to express their views given that you are the webmaster and allocator of resources? Single parents come from all areas of society and this networking site is a great idea but the anti women attitude is really offputting. Let me balance up your recent opinions. What about the 1 in 3 women who have a sexually abusive experience by a male by the time the are 16? What about the 1 in 100 that get reported and the 1 in 100 that get convicted after that? I find your attitude to be dangerous as it encourages sections of society to turn against eachother rather than work together. I hope you don’t see yourself as a spokesperson for single parents. Thank god for what labour has done for our society - reduced child poverty with the introduction of working for families, made it more difficult for people who abuse their kids to minimise and deny their behaviour. I wonder if the womens centres and other groups your site links to agree with your views? I wonder if you will publish this. I doubt it.
October 4th, 2007 at 2:21 pm
Virginia, thanx for you reply. Firstly, I am sorry that you are feeling offended. I am not out to offend you personally but I do want to tell you some things. The first thing I should start of is with the 1 in 3 women rape myth. In the 80’s the feminists had a night on TV where the phones were open for donations because they said that 1 in 4 women were raped at some time in their life. After they had collected the money and heaps of men were put in prison and lots of women recieved compensation the truth came out that this was just a lie. Now they are coming back to do exactly the same they did in the 80’s and many New Zealanders remember what havoc happened back then. So it is important to speak up so my own sons do not live through the same radical days.
The women working in the refuges in the 80’s and the 90’s considered the leaders, the same that are in politician positions mad as in insane. It would do you some good to start learning from those who have been working in the trade for longer than 10 years. The men’s groups can’t move. They can’t support the men because the feminists won’t allow them to do things their own way. That is wrong and that is biased.
Also I have a feminist friend who is one step away from being a politician. She will not speak up because she has worked hard for her position for 20 years. And she is not the only one. You need to understand this is not about you personally or your wonderful job. And you need to start asking to look at the questions the feminists use in their statistics.
October 4th, 2007 at 2:26 pm
BTW, I am aware that feminism has turned it’s attention to social engineering and I do like the idea of bringing down the corrupt behaviour of global organisations exploiting the poor and corrupt leadership. But not based on anti male. We could all work together for these things. We don’t not need to do it under the idea that women are oppressed.
October 5th, 2007 at 12:31 pm
I have been in the ‘trade’ as you call it for 20 years. Just my current job for ten which by the way is the largest centre in NZ for working with victims of sexual assault so feel that I am well qualified to inform you that the statistics are well grounded, have come from many many studies, are accepted even by the police, government and are in line with international statistics. By the way we have a couple of lesbians here and they aren’t man haters and the even work to keep families together in whatever form is workable. I work closely with all of the domestic violence centres in my region. NO lesbians there actually and I don’t know of any organisations operating solely for political gain - they all have a duty to raise the awareness of issues for society and are generally underfunded to provide the service they need to so have a political need yes. I’m not into bagging other groups in society so won’t bother responding to some of you uninformed ideas but I don’t enjoy reading through the numerous political, gender and philisophical attacks on this website. Speaking of oppression (which women don’t have the corner of the marke on, being a human being does though) how about one that is a bit friendlier to all single parents regardless of their position in society?
October 5th, 2007 at 3:43 pm
Virginia,
I am happy that you have commented and that you have been the “trade” for 20 years because then you can understand me and my frustration with the system. No the stats are not correct. Not for putting men in prison for 8-15 years of their lives. The stats consist of many forms of sexual abuse which range from feeling like you are forced into a situation like a wife who feels uncomfortable to have sex with her husband or boyfriend to being physically forced into sexual intercourse. This also includes women being drunk and regretting it the next day. Now if you were to ask males the same questions you would find that at least 1 out of 3 also are raped. If you were to ask men if they feel they are doing something they don’t like most would say yes. They would easily prefer to just come when they want instead of trying to hold on until the women is satisfied. And not just that but don’t you think young men feel pressured to perform. And on another note; males are not getting the women drunk to have sex with them. The women are getting themselves drunk. Look around at the behaviour of our women. They are sometimes more out of control than our males.
We are not being fair on them. And men DO get raped from women. But no-one acknowledges this. I have spoken with a rape crisis spokesperson and they deny that women rape and they deny that the women are getting themsleves drunk. In fact when I ask who represents the men, they mentioned one men’s group in Christchurch which last time I checked this year can’t get funding from the Government and they only deal with males who are raped by males.
And what about men’s refuges. Why can’t we have those. Why are we bound to policy that states, “Men are historically rapists and wife beaters” Why does the Human Rights Commission and the Families Commission ignore men’s needs.
I wrote to the Human Rights Commission and Roslyn Noonan told me they are aware of the discrimination of men. But they do nothing.
I know that lesbians are not anti male on the whole. In fact some are the ones who are pushing me to help the males.
But I hear what you are saying regarding a single parents group. And BTW, Auckland Women’s Centre is aware of my stand. They said it is not for any women’s groups to care about males. The male groups have to do that for themselves. It is hard for me to not notice the bias in the community or in Commissions or at Government level.
However, you are right to say this is not single mothers problem. This site should not be to address the bias for half our clients. Maybe you can help me out. Maybe over coffee.
October 6th, 2007 at 9:25 am
donthave time to sit and think this out so i can word it porperly so excuse me for my rambling thats most likely to occur lol… i’ve always been against feminism though sorry lol and trust me i am a very strong minded female who has no doubts that i’m equal in many ways to men. but there is where my issue lies though.. because if we are in fact so equal to men then why can’t we rape them and take advantage of them and beat them as men do females? i can’t figure out why if we’re supposed to be equal then why do people deny that females can’t rape or be the instigators of domestic violence? i grew up in domestic violence, in my immediate family my step father was the instigator.. BUT my step fathers MOTHER was the instigator in his family and used to beat the living hell out of us grandkids and her own children.. i can ask any number of my own friends in my generation (im only 21) and i’ll hear stories about their MOTHERS with the jug cords and beatings.. one of my close friends was killed by his mother with an axe after years of abuse by her hands.. domestic violence isn’t just partner beating partner… children are included too and hello haven’t we just heard more than a few stories this year already about WOMEN killing their children? Also i know a fair amount of females who have laid false rape claims.. because basically men don’t have a leg to stand on with rape claims… they’re bigger and stronger than the female so it looks easy for them to have done it and obviously the female will be absolutely distressed because as females we all know how utterly dramatic and manipulative we can be.. which is another point… we are. females can be the most cruel cold and calculating people there are… we go for the jugular with the intent to cause damage either emotionally mentally or physically… if females want to be equal to males.. then i think we have to make it completely equal.. and take responsibility for the fact that as equals we do exactly the same thing.
October 6th, 2007 at 2:22 pm
Thank-you for replying jarellsmom,
I will continue on to tell others what is going on because if you have sons you are for a big shock to what the feminists are doing. The radicals are back in charge and there is a lot that is going to happen in the next year.
I phoned mental health for help with my son one time when he was 17 because he got into a fight and was to go to court. The whole thing got thrown out but at the time I was scared and thought they could help. I stayed in all interviews THANK GOD and in one they ask him about sex. I told him to be honest before we went to the interview and this is what he said. “I see girls from behind wearing heels and mini skirts and I think a sexual thought but then when I see them from the front I think, ‘Damn, she’s only 12 or something.’ It is hard to know who to like.” I could see the eyes of the 2 female interviewers bulge and I literally put my hands up in a surrender gesture and said, “Take it easy. It is normal for teenage males to have sexual thoughts” But the the verdict was in and in writing. My son is a potential rapist on paper. How bad is that?
Now the feminists are fighting to have all background information included in court cases. Where is that going to leave my son? So I am fighting Mental health to fix this problem. But because they have to do things the feminist way and not common sense way, I am up against a brick wall. Any normal person would have said, “Good on ya son, you respect the age of the women.”
October 8th, 2007 at 7:32 pm
actually me and my mate just finished having a conversation about statutory rape lol, and after it we had a question which i’m not sure on (the answer that is).. say a 15yr old girl has an 17/18yr old boyfriend and they have consensual sex, then say the parents or the girl even claim statutory rape on the guy… what happens to the girl? does she get in any trouble at all? or is it just the guy left with the stigma of being a ‘rapist’? and as for your sons comment quoted above i think it shows great maturity rather than a potential rapists thoughts!!! i know plenty of guys who couldn’t care less how old the girls really are as long as they’re pretty!
October 8th, 2007 at 9:31 pm
Women and girls do not get into trouble for false rape complaints. Feminist research says it is a cry for help. Never mind the males and what they go through. Never mind how it rips their lives apart or that of their families nor of the legal bill they have to pay to prove their innocence.
I will tell you also that our system works this way. Men are guilty and they have to prove their innocence. It is the way it is in Western countries. They are not innocent until proven guilty. Did you not know that women don’t lie? cough, cough. The police used to speak up and say that between 60 - 80% of rape claims were false. Now they can’t because the feminists went after the police collectively on a world wide scale. Everything that the feminists do here in NZ they also do at around the same time in Canada, Australia, Europe and America. This is all very carefully calculated.
October 9th, 2007 at 8:41 pm
this is all a load of crap i think it’s total and utter bull.. there is NO way in hell that i’d ever want my son going through stuff like that and having to live like that and feel the way he’d feel living like that and i can tell you now if anyone tried to do anything close like that to him there would be hell to pay! makes me so MAD!!!!!
October 13th, 2007 at 11:07 am
Jarellsmom, there is every chance your son will get to experience the ways of the modern ‘Eve’ The feminist movement has indeed hijacked the womens refuge etc and made it their own agenda to promote amongst women to not recognise of the needs of men and their families. You watch, your boy WILL no doubt get caught up in all this unless you insist he does not readily commit AND get him involved with a mens organisation so he may be taught properly the ways of ‘Eve’ and her treacherous ways. It’s up to you protect him by arming him with the information he is due otherwise all he will get is a lifetime of abuse and misery.
Did did you know that 30% of all NZ males that leave school cannot read nor write and in lower socio eco areas the figure is 50%? this is indeed the the arm of ‘Eve’ at work and goes right back to how and who taught them at primary school level.
The feminazis are indeed in a very strong position and the dumbing down of our male children is serving their agender rather well right now.
Good luck and all the best for you and your son.