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Copyright © 2010 Auckland Single Parents Trust - All Rights Reserved 
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hi im craig2 comments to hi im craigYou must be logged in to post a comment. |
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Copyright © 2010 Auckland Single Parents Trust - All Rights Reserved
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Hello Craig
good to hear from you. I know you like jokes so hear is one.
Woman: Would you get married again if I died?
Man: Definitely not!
Woman: Why not — don’t you like being married?
Man: Of course I do.
Woman: Then why wouldn’t you remarry?
Man: Okay, I’d get married again.
Woman: You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)
Man: (audible groan)
Woman: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
Man: Where else would we sleep?
Woman: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
Man: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
Woman: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
Man: She can’t use them — she’s left-handed.
Woman: (silence)
Here’s another
Two women, just newly arrived at the pearly gates, are comparing stories on how they died and reached Heaven.
1st woman: “I froze to death.”
2nd woman: “How horrible!”
1st woman: “It wasn’t so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?”
2nd woman: “I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected my husband of cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. Instead, I found him all by himself in the living room watching TV.”
1st woman: “So what happened?”
2nd woman: “I was so sure there was another woman there, I started hunting all over the house. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every cupboard and checked under all the beds.”
I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.”
1st woman: “Too bad you didn’t look in the freezer. We’d both still be alive!